Growth Mindset: We can all change - but not without discomfort

“Growth mindset” has become the green juice of the self-help world—everyone’s talking about it, sipping on it, but very few are actually digesting it.

It’s the belief that your intelligence, abilities, and skills aren’t fixed - they can be developed. Great pitch and something the personal growth industry has gone bananas for as “self-help” becomes yet another capitalistic notion for betterment.

We continuously scroll and consume the next “thing” in the idea that we are growing…. But are we? Are we evolving or distracting ourselves from the actual work that needs to be done for change.

This article cuts through the hype to show you what a growth mindset really means and how to live it.

What Is a Growth Mindset

Coined by psychologist Carol Dweck, growth mindset is the belief that your abilities, intelligence, and skills are not set in stone. They can be developed through effort, strategy, feedback, and persistence.

A fixed mindset says: “This is just who I am.”
A growth mindset says: “This is who I am—for now.”

It’s a way of approaching life that says:

“I’m not fixed. I’m not finished. And if I’m willing to face some discomfort, I can evolve.”

But the wellness industry got its hands on it and turned it into spiritual bubble wrap:

“Mistakes are good!”
“Just try your best!”
“Failure is feedback!”

Cute. Marketable. Incomplete.

The hard edge got sanded off. The personal responsibility got swapped for affirmation. And suddenly, growth mindset became something you say instead of something you practice.

Having a growth mindset is about embracing discomfort, taking risks, being challenged, taking radical responsibility, and doing the hard work to actually change.

Real Growth = Discomfort + Curiosity + Action

Here’s what actual growth looks like - its Gritty

1. You Get Called Out—and Lean In

When someone challenges you, do you shut down or get curious? A growth mindset means listening even when it bruises the ego.

2. You Do Hard Things on Purpose

Not just when you’re forced to. You choose the discomfort because you know it leads somewhere better. It’s about discipline over dopamine.

3. You Take Feedback Without Flinching

You don’t always like it—but you don’t collapse from it either. You use it to calibrate, not catastrophise.

4. You Let Go of Who You Think You Are

That version of you who’s “bad with money” or “not good in relationships”? You kill that storyline. You stop defending your limitations and start rewriting the script.

5. You Fail—and Stay in the Ring

Growth doesn’t mean you never stuff it up. It means you don’t walk off the mat when you do.

Why It Matters

Because the opposite of growth isn’t failure - it’s stagnation.
People don’t burn out or feel lacking because they’re doing too much or the wrong thing - It's because they are doing the same thing, over and over, and calling it a life.

Think about it. When was the last time you chose curiosity OVER comfort? Perseverance over the convenient option? Most people plateau after 30. They stop trying new things because being bad at stuff is “embarrassing”. They seek ease to “help” their challenging day-to-day existence.

But if you’re not failing at anything, you’re not learning?
And if you’re not learning, you’re not growing.
And if you’re not growing, you’re just repeating.

How It Works: Brains, Behaviour, and Getting Uncomfortable

Here’s where the science backs me up:

Neuroscience proves your brain isn’t fixed - it’s constantly rewiring itself based on what you do. Repetition carves the pathways. So if you keep avoiding discomfort and playing it safe? You’re hardwiring that.

Behavioural Science is clear: Confidence doesn’t come first. Action does. You build it by showing up, falling short, tweaking, and trying again. Growth feels awkward. You’ll feel exposed. Underqualified. Not ready.

Don’t wait to feel ready or easy - start moving and change will follow.

Practical Growth Mindset Tips

Anticipated Regret
Ask: “What will I regret not learning, doing, or trying in 10 years?”
Then go do it - even (especially) if it scares the hell out of you.
Time Affluence
Make space. Growth doesn’t happen on a packed calendar or in a reactive mindset.
Consciously create space to reflect, learn, and experiment.
Be a Beginner Again
That thing you’ve avoided because you don’t want to look silly? Go try it.
Your ego won’t like it - but your brain will thrive on it.

Change isn’t passive. It doesn’t come from scrolling, reading, or thinking deeply while avoiding discomfort. It comes from action.
You need to challenge yourself. Repeatedly.
Growth isn’t cute. It’s awkward. It’s frustrating.
So stop asking, “Am I growing?”
And start asking, “Where am I hiding?”

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